Role of Women 

April 1, 1991

     Ba'ba' spoke saying a woman should think of her husband as the manifestation of the Lord.  She should surrender to him.  He, in turn, should protect and respect her.

     I felt a bit taken aback by this.  It sounded a bit subservient. Then Ba'ba' said I am influenced by the bondage's of my culture.  That the way my (American) culture is encourages women to compete with men.  The hearts of women are wounded and in response, they resort to intellectual competition.  He said that he does not condone the Indian system either.  He said it is (I believe He said), deplorable.  There women are subservient, but He seemed to think this culture is little better. He said He is not saying that women are inferior to men nor that they are not as intelligent as men. Only their minds are slightly different (on the lower levels).  He said our culture is little better than Indian regarding women. In India, women are relegated to the role of cattle, and it is deplorable, but in this culture, their heart is wounded. So they take to competing with men with anger in their hearts. He said when women's hearts are wounded everyone suffers. They reject their husbands, families are torn apart, children suffer.

     He says this competitive way does not bring happiness to women.  They are intellectual equals to men. Women can be very bright, this is not the issue.  But that men are by nature more mental, more rational or intellectually oriented and women are more sentimental or emotionally oriented.  He said rare is the woman who can find true happiness in the competitive Western mode. It is the nature and greatness of women to rely on men, to surrender their welfare to them.

     I again felt uncomfortable. Does this mean you support patriarchy?  He said no, it does not. He said over and over in this conversation that this is a dark age in the world and there is confusion, implying the true relation of men and women has been forgotten. He said that women can and should be leaders, and that men must learn to honor, to respect women.  He said in the coming time men and women will both lead, but that women will be the torch-bearers.

     Then when I was writing, Ba'ba' chose to continue His comments:

"Husband should be very kind, very benevolent and very caring with wife, in a marriage of love.  Marriage should be not arranged, but given out of mutual feelings of attraction. In marriage, wife should look to husband as protector. She should surrender her defenses and trust to husband, ideating that he is the very Supreme Entity come for her benefit to care for her. This is the ideal mentality of a woman in marriage. When spiritual path is sought by such a woman, it should not include a separation of family and Dharma. Dharma can be served in family as well as in society. Women should serve in family and then in society. Family should remain central as emotional bonds are very important to women.  It is through her soothing touch that all around find solace. So to see husband as Supreme and serve him and family when husband is true can bring great fulfillment and happiness to a woman. Also, spiritual evolvement comes easily in such a circumstance. It is much more difficult for women's spiritual growth when they must forge ahead without such emotional protection.

     "As for Guru and women, often in the ages of history, Guru has been in feminine form. Many, many realized souls have been women.  They have often been spiritual leaders. But in Kali yuga, women have lost this status. Women have become the slaves of men. It is deplorable. Now they openly revolt. Their suffering continues.

     "In the coming age, women will regain their heritage. They will be leaders both spiritually and politically. They will have influence in matters of importance and their hearts will settle. They will regain their happiness and men also will find a proper adjustment, a natural adjustment. Competition between men and women will cease. Both will have respect and authority. In this age men will not dominate. Women will hold the primary influence, but not to the detriment of men."