edit: dap, 1, 10/5/96

1.1.1 FNS

There comes a time in the life of every human being when the person must reflect upon their human existence. When this time comes in the life of a human being, it is most important to take the opportunity and reflect upon your own existence. For the very purpose of human life is to come in contact with the Great. You may fulfill so many desires, you may achieve so many great things in your life, you may have so many degrees, you may fulfill so many worldly acts, yet none of these things alone will satisfy you, for the deep satisfaction that comes with complete fulfillment, you must come to know the self within. You must come to know the nature of your own existence, for it is in knowing the nature of your own existence that you will be able to realize the Great and find happiness that is lasting, that cannot be thrown away with the movements of life. The self within you is eternal, pure and self-resplendent. It is the very core of your existence. Why run about on the surface of your life, when you can delve deep within to know the nature of your own being. When you ask yourself "who am I"? what do you see inside of yourself? Do you see that little person who works in a certain place, who has done certain activities, who has certain attachments, do you see that person, that little 'I', who is behind that life? Who is that 'I', who has done all of these things, thought all of these things, who has lived within this little body, who is that 'I'? That one who is the witness of your existence is also the witness of this entire universe. Within you there is one 'I' , that 'I' who is the witness of your existence, the little 'I' is called in Sanskrit the atman. Atman means unit 'I', unit soul.

And the atman is the small reflection of the Paramatman. Paramatman means supreme, Para is supreme, supreme atman, supreme soul, oversoul. It is like the moon which is shining. The full moon shines in the night and in the jungles there are so many pools of water upon the ground and in each and every pool there is the reflection of the moon. So in each and every individual mind there is the reflection of the Supreme. The Paramatman is as the great moon shining upon the whole earth and there are many puddles as there are, there will be that many reflections of the moon. But are there so many different moons? No, there is just one moon, reflecting in all of the puddles. That one moon is the Paramatma, the witnessing entity of all existence and that witnessing entity is reflected in all the small mirrors of His existence and you are a mirror, each one is a mirror of His existence. You are the mirror image and so when you think 'I', 'I' who is the witness of my life, who is aware of my actions, my thoughts, my feelings, who works at my job, who does so many things and who is the witness of all of this. That 'I' is the reflection of the cosmic 'I', the cosmic witness of all manifestation.

Now you may ask if there is a difference between the reflection of the moon and the moon itself, are they two separate entities. They are in fact not , there is only one moon, only it is reflected in the ponds, but since it is a reflection, its actuality lies in the one moon. Like this, the actuality of the atman lies in the Paramatman, the actuality of the witness, the real witness of your existence is not in individualized 'I', it is in truth the witnessing entity of all creation. There is only one being and you are not apart, you are not separate from that one. So take your sustenance from the self within you , do not rely on external events, external circumstance, people, situations for your sustenance, take your sustenance from the self within. And see that all that you meet around you is only the reflection of that self. Do you appreciate another human being , a small creature? Any and all that you appreciate, you must ask yourself in truth, who is it you are appreciating? Is it the self, you think it is a small cat, you think it is a friend, a husband, wife , you think it is this person you are appreciating, this creature you are appreciating, this rose upon the bush you are appreciating . But what are you appreciating? You are appreciating the Supreme, for the moon reflects in many ponds and all of these ponds in which the beautiful moon is in full reflection are all very lovely. Some are long and thin, some are wide, some are fully and beautifully circled, each one is a bit different in shape and form , but each one is a mirror for the Great and what you appreciate in all that surrounds you it's Parama Purusha, is it not? It is the witnessing entity , the conscious divinity which is reflected in the vibrancy of each and every living being.

So when you appreciate someone, it is very good to appreciate others, but remember who is reflected and who looks at you with shining eyes and whom you care for and when you feel the warmth of friendship, the caring of another, when you feel warm feelings for anyone, remember, what it is, whom it is you are attracted to. For there is a natural attraction between living beings, do you know that the divine is attracted and attracting, so attracting. So you are naturally attracted to Him in all so many forms. It is a natural attraction. The only difficulty is that many times you may get confused and think that it is this person, that it is this little pond that is long and thin or this little pond that is round, that is the essence to which you are attracted. But it is not the shape of the pond, it is what is contained within the pond, it is not the form, it is the essence to which you are truly attracted. And that essence is one. So love with all your heart, love all, love fully, love completely, but remember whom you love. And then you will be freed from delusion, seeing the reality, you will know that there is nothing to loose and nothing to gain, for all around you is the divine, within you is the divine, there is no place that that one does not exist.

You are what you search for and what you search for is all around. Wipe the film from your eyes and you will see it is a very beautiful existence. May you be happy and may this year bring you great joy, knowing the self which is all around you and within you.

Now there is a question?

Q: Yes Baba, there is. Your talk this evening was very interesting. There is this puddle that is currently known as Nick Turner. And very often I feel like I am stuck in that puddle and I know of no other reflection of the moon than that one puddle. I would like to rise up out of the puddle and dive into some other puddles and be able to see the moon reflected in all of these puddles in the jungle and I want that very much. I want to know the experience of the moon and this is the strong desire of mine. Your talk tonight really brings to the front of my mind this feeling I have that there is this great gulf between the reflections and the moon itself. It confuses me. I never have understood how this separate experience this one has, this Nick Turner can be a part of that great experience without my being able to perceive that. It's confusing to me.

A: Go within yourself, close your eyes, go within. You find the experience of your 'I' feeling, you have it?

Yes.

You find this experience 'I', 'I', 'I'. Reflect who is 'I', who is 'I', reflect. Go deep into the core of that 'I' feeling, in the core of your personalized existence. If you want to know others, know the one that is within. In the core of that personalized existence the witnesship of all of your thoughts, all of your actions, all of your existence, go into the witnesship. Now this witness is the witness of the thought which is occurring at this moment in your mind. Behind the thought, behind the 'I', the one who says: " I know, I exist", the knower of your existence, the one who is self-aware, this self-aware knowing, the cognitive entity, the knower of your existence is the same knower of all existence.

Go deep in the self. The one who knows that you exist, find the knower. In that knowledge, awareness, apart from identification with any experience, apart from identification with any movements of the mind, the pure knowledge of your existence, the one who witnesses your existence, the knower, isolate the knower from experience. In that knowledge is the knowledge of all experience, is the knowledge of the self. Go deep into this knowledge, apart from thought, apart from movement and in that one you will know all. It is not to jump from puddle to puddle chasing reflections of the Great, for all you will have are reflections, you jump in the puddle and what happens, hm. It is all disturbed. So what you do instead. You know the knower within you and then you will have the direct contact, because that reflection is an illusion, it is only a mirror image, but the truth is, what is there, is in the moon all around. The reflection, the image is coming from the moon. The knower of your existence is the knower of all. Know that one deep within and all knowledge will come to you.

Q: I want to know how I can be more open to possibilities to supporting myself through right livelihood, how can I be more aware of possibilities. So often I feel lost trying to find my ways.

Baba: What do you want?

John: I try to be open where I can do well and see ultimately the world to be a better place.

Baba: Do you want to serve your fellow beings?

John: Yes.

Baba: Do you want that your life should be dedicated to service?

John: Yes.

Baba: Then use your life and the strength that you have for the service of living beings. If you look around you, you will find there is much you can do. Dedicate yourself to serving others. What you need will be provided. You need never worry. Rest your mind on this account. Dedicate yourself with sincerity and wholeheartedness to the service of living beings and never think again if you shall be cared for. For if you put yourself in the hands of the Great and give your all to living beings, you will be provided for. Don't worry.

John: Thank you.